I've written about recovering from shingles a good bit. It's been a process that has been slower than I would like.
But just when I think I'm better, I'll get a shooting pain down my arm, reminding me that I'm not back to 100%. Ah the gift of illness.
My yoga practice has been off and on (yeah, I still haven't created my personal yoga studio at home that I wrote about when I was really sick).
But the quiet of the past few weeks has given me the opportunity to get into a community studio that I've really enjoyed -- Soho PiYo in Homewood.
I've been working with a wonderful instructor named Suzanne Graham, who has met my Type-A, perfectionist self with compassion. On a practical level, Suzanne has helped me modify my practice to accommodate my bum arm and other challenges.
When I push myself too much (which I know I'm doing because my arms shake and I hold my breath, among other signs), Suzanne looks over and gives me a sign that I need to ease up. Then I fold myself into child's pose or another restful position, and try to suspend judgment of myself. This is one of the things I'm working on.
Anyhow, in addition to teaching regular classes, Suzanne does something called "Yoga Nidra" several times a month. The class is held on Friday nights from 6 to 7:30 p.m. From her description:
"Yoga Nidra or 'Yogic Sleep' is a combination of relaxation, affirmation, respiration and visualization techniques that are used together to create deep relaxation in the physical body. This multidimensional approach to relaxation facilitates deep integration of mind, body, and spirit."
I was running late to Yoga Nidra Friday night, having gotten caught up in traffic and a million other things that day. Convinced I would disrupt the class that had already started, I wondered if it was even worth it to duck in with my mat under my arm.
It was. The first 20 or 30 minutes we practiced some gentle yoga. Then began the Yoga Nidra. Suzanne advised us to get comfortable on our mats. We lay down, covered up with thick blankets and listened to her instruction, eyes closed.
Then the most amazing thing happened: we did yoga without moving an inch off our mats. In the quiet studio, with only the whirring of a fan, Suzanne walked us through steps to help us unwind from whatever busied us that week. She encouraged us to concentrate on our breath, and the sensations in our bodies, from our little toes on up.
In this 45 minutes, I was able to rest more than I usually do in eight hours of sleep. I felt the tension in my spine and hips and let some of it go. I cleared my head of self-defeating thoughts. The things that Suzanne called are things "that no longer serve you."
Yoga nidra isn't about abandoning what's happening in your mind, but quieting these scripts long enough to breathe, to feel what's happening throughout your body. There's always time to think and over think. That started as soon as the lights came back on. But for 45 minutes I was OK with just existing, just observing. Small steps.
I'll be going back to yoga nidra for sure. But first I'm breathing, which is yoga in itself.
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